Regrets
by RiteM
Summary: Many of the things Red thought were just lies made by his young foolish mind. And so were the choices he made after finding that out.


"You're kidding..." A stuttering voice echoed. Scoffing, the human who owned it looked around the large empty room, that had then become excessively quiet compared to the loud commotion that ended just seconds ago. His face, covered in sweat and confusion, showed his unhappy state of mind. He had just lost the most important battle of his life to the person he despised the most.

He felt furious, _envious._

The only other person in the room smiled at him, their crimson eyes widening in excitement. They smiled happily at him, ignoring the other's obvious change of mood. The boy who had lost, eyes fixed on the floor, wondered what had gotten to himself. He sighed loudly as nothing came to mind.

He stood strait, and stared at the other. His frown hadn't changed, but his eyes showed longing. Longing to be as successful as the rest of the people in that position. The position he only had an hour being in. Which would hold on to him forever.

He shook his head, as the other one was crowded with hugs and congratulations from the souls who never paid any attention to him when he rose to the championship. Even his own grandfather had not arrived in time to see him at the top.

It was a shame, but he had very well learned what it meant to be looked at with the cold, meaningful eyes that glanced towards him once in a while as they gathered around the other trainer in cheers.

He hadn't been a grateful trainer.

He hadn't been a grateful person.

O/O\O

His attention span was a rude awakening to the noisy wind around him.

Glittered in white, sparkling bright flakes of snow flew around his unmoving body, that sat on the cold ground ponderously. Enduring the freezing breaths of air that was brought with each blow of the wind, he stared up into the sky, waiting for something.

Could it occur to him yet that what he was waiting for, was indeed waiting for him?

Only one person knew the answer to that question. And just the boys luck, that one person wasn't there then, and wasn't going to be until he found out himself. Oh, but what joy the boy had, alone in the darkness of his surroundings, where only he could decide for himself and no one else could stop him. Although, contrary to his earlier belief, there wasn't quite much to be stopped from doing up there.

After two years of enduring the cold, he's finally taken to a custom way of getting around and getting throughout the day without wanting to run back to his start. And its been working. Each day, the mountain he's been isolated in feels more like home.

Yet it will never feel exactly like home. As he will see in the future it was just a place of useless searching. Which wasn't even searching at all.

He didn't know yet. Nobody knew yet what he would learn in so little years.

A small, yellow furred creature sat in between his legs, his hands running through its fur slowly, almost unconscious to his action. It curled up to his leg, taking his undivided attention.

It was fully unaware of its trainer's longing.

He sighed, his eyes fixing on it's shivering state before staring back towards the clouds above him, that blew with hesitation.

Whether or not it looked like it, he was hesitant himself. But he didn't know what for yet.

O/O\O

Yawning, the almost-eighteen year old stood up from his uncomfortable position and walked towards the fire that burned bright around the cave. He smiled as he lied down beside it on his back, staring up at the ceiling in wonder.

There were much more mysterious things in life than the rocky ceiling of a cave, but the dripping stalactites gave him life when he was out of energy, and cheered him up when he was down.

A large orange dragon, of sorts, stomped up and beside him, sitting down with a thump. It growled in humorous annoyance, leaving its trainer to quietly chuckle at it, before going back to the empty state of mind he was drifting off to before.

Powerful creatures which formed the world in more than many ways were the only key to happiness for him that he knew of.

But that was it. After almost six years of standing alone upon a mountain of ice and silence, he's finally found the reason he was there—to wait.

To wait for what he longed for.

To wait for the missing piece in his life.

O/O\O

To wait for the warm vegetable soup the Nurse at the Center was serving him.

She sat the heating bowl down on the table gracefully, fingers holding on tight to the hot, stainless-white glass with pleasure. It was obvious she had wanted some as well, as she stared at the bowl, finally letting go and smiling at his hungry state.

The Center was quiet and scarce of trainers most of the time, and when seeing him, the Nurse always served up the best of her fresh meals and sat down for a long conversation with the isolated teen. Despite how he was around others, (Quiet and blunt to the state of offense,) he was very open with her, like he was with very few people in his life.

The Center was there then only to keep him safe, because he was the only trainer that visited anymore.

O/O\O

There was a harsh blizzard when the other boy arrived.

Hot-headed and curious, the boy with the Typhlosion traveled through the rough mountain in no time, arriving there to meet him face-to-face. He requested a battle.

The boy lost. And headed back down.

O/O\O

He was hungry then. Alone and hungry.

About week or two ago—as if he remembered—the Center was closed for a lack of trainers.

He was twenty now. Sitting on top of the mountain with a strive for something that just won't come.

Something that takes everything he holds dearly away until he has nothing.

But that's not it for him.

As far as he knew he had nothing, and this "Something" wasn't exactly a something at all. In fact, he was looking for if it was _anything_. Was there really anything to look for anymore?

That's the question he learned to ask himself every day. Was he just living up there for nothing? Was there a reason he didn't know of? Why had he come there in the first place?

He couldn't answer the question correctly then. His mind was too busy mourning over his loss of friendship and fresh food. And the company he had been given for all the useless time spent. The useless time waiting instead of searching. Because something _wanted_ him. But something couldn't reach him.

Sooner or later, after a whole two more years of berries, plants, and everything else edible around the mountain, his shape had gotten scrawnier, but his mind had gotten fuller.

As he plucked a ripe apple from a tree, his mind became flooded with thoughts of his reason once again. Each day he thought of it, and each day it seemed he failed to answer the question of why it wasn't coming to him. Do I have to wait longer? He usually asked.

The gleaming green apple slipped out of his gloved hands and onto the wet spring grass below him. The realization was overwhelming, as he stared at it blankly; and it wasn't that he had to wait for _Something_. It was that he had to _search_ for it.

Pikachu brushed off the apple and handed it to him from below.

O/O\O

The boy from earlier casually visited him from time to time, having multiple rematches whenever possible. He still didn't understand yet; why he was losing.

Nibbling on the apple with a chuckle, he packed everything he owned into his bags and rearranged the cave how it was before he arrived so long ago. (Which took quite a while,)

And when done, placing his warm coat over his shoulders, bundling a scarf around his neck and carrying three huge bags of pokemon supplements and food, he abandoned his temporary home and padded boldly down and through the cave. Where the Kanto region awaited his arrival back in the silent days of threat and fraud.

He would from then on search wildly for the something he had asked for so long ago.

O/O\O

But what is _Something?_

That is a question that will never be answered.


End file.
